De-Liver Me Tour ~ November 26, 2014

Thanksgiving is upon us and I have so much to be thankful for. The universe continues to amaze and reveal itself in curious ways.

When Starships Collide

https://www.etsy.com/shop/RobertBridgesImagery

Update: I've been on the drug combo of Ribivarin and Sovaldi for Hepatitis C since October 17th. As reported before, there have been no side effects. What I wasn't prepared for was the swiftness of quantifiable results. I had baseline tests done on October 15th and my viral load was 135,825. At the end of the first week it was at 88 and has continued to drop. My liver inflammation indicators: AST, ALT and ALP are within the normal range for the first time in 20 plus years. Say What? I had my quarterly CT scan and MELD blood tests this week. What's next depends on the CT scan being clear and Hep C being undetectable in my blood. I should hear back from my doc next week.

One more thing off the list and a full circle tour: Headed to San Francisco on November 17th to get reacquainted with a couple we met through our friend Maureen Lomasney. Alice and John have generously offered Rod their spare bedroom while I'm captive a UCSF. After a short visit we headed to Mill Valley and on a whim stopped at Grilly's Mexican Food down near Tam High School for lunch. Great choice, excellent meal. Up and over Mt. Tam to Stinson Beach for a 2 mile walk and to check on the yard and house plants at my cousin's cabin. The day was absolutely gorgeous, we got home before dark and totally refreshed. 

Omne Trium Perfectum: In the last 5 days we've had friends visit from here and beyond, quite literally. One of my oldest pals, Tom Gross and his friend Suzanne, came by for a couple of hours on Saturday on their way back to New Hampshire. He's moving back home to Sebastopol in January after having been gone 7 years. Sunday and Monday, my college roommate, Maggie Rose and her husband came all the way from Cedro Woolley, WA for a two day visit. We hadn't seem them in 5 or 6 years. Last night my late friend Trisha showed up in my dreams with a hug and a smile. The clans and my spirit guides are gathering to walk with me on the journey, you may know them as you know me:

Crow: Questioner of Authority

Crow

https://www.etsy.com/shop/RikkiVanCamp

Wolf: Stamina and Strength

Wolf

https://www.etsy.com/shop/DeanCrouserArt

Swan: Beneath my serenity lies a fighting spirit

Swan

https://www.etsy.com/shop/NewLeafPics

Be thankful for family, friends and all the little things. Life is short so get off your butt and on with the journey.  Thanks once again to Etsy artisans who never fail at illustrating my thoughts and musings. 

Fabulous Friday Finds ~ Bird Garglers ~ November 21, 2014

What is a Bird Gargler™? 

From potter Douglas Fey: the name is "Derived from a combination of colonial American earthenware birdhouses called bird bottles and medieval gargoyles. As a gargoyle gargles water, the Bird Garglers™ appear to gargle birds". I think I need one of these where it can be seen from my studio. 

If you want to learn more check out his website at

http://www.douglasfeypottery.com/douglasfeypottery.com

The Trunk Series ~ Moments in Time ~ December 2, 1963

Fall of 1963 was my first semester at UCSB. I didn't have a car at the time and rode home for Thanksgiving with a friend from Mill Valley. I flew back on December 2nd. Take note of the cost of the flight. Yes, you're reading it correctly at $22.37. I looked up the conversion to 2014 dollars and it translates to $171.49. The actual cost of a one way flight, half a century later, is now about $220.00.  

Check out the Hertz ticket pouch. Oh Baby, a Chevy hardtop. Maggie, my housemate in the Pine Hall dorms, had a white one. We saw a lot of California in that beast and once set a land speed record from UCSB to Mill Valley to make it to a party at Rym Partridge's house. 

It's amazing how a small piece of paper can open doors to the past, to your history, and to some of your monumental dumb ass moves as a teenager. It's a wonder we survived our youth.

Fabulous Friday Finds ~ November 14, 2014

Welcome to the whimsical side of the world of Robert Stebleton. He is not only a woodcarver but an accomplished painter. Learn more about him and see his works at this link:  http://robertstebletonfineart.com/about

I dare you to keep a straight face the rest of the day. Have a good weekend.

Stop the presses! The rest of the story from the Album of the Heart entry of March 9, 1874

Shortly after I posted the March 9, 1874 entry to my blog (Nov 7th) I heard from my friend Margo Metegrano, a dedicated researcher of poems and their authors, and the driving force behind CowboyPoetry.com. She was intrigued by the spelling of "momentoes" in the poem title and decided to look into it. Low and behold she found the author and entire poem in the online archives of Lloyd's Weekly London Newspaper dated August 8, 1847. I didn't catch it but "momentoes" is a misspelling of the word "mementoes". Ida's entry was excerpted from the poem but the spelling of the title was her own.

Mementoes of the Past

Where is there a little flower,
To fill the heart with sadness?
What is there in a leafless bower,
To give the spirit gladness?
What is there in the flowing streams,
That bind the traveller fast?
Those transient, visionary gleams
Momentoes of the past!

The little violet in our path,

May give us days of sorrow;

Tis such a fondness memory hath,

Of youthful years to borrow:

Whole volumes, at such times, are read

Within the humblest flower,

As we the paths of childhood tread

If but for one brief hour!

The rust of time, frail memory's strings

May almost wear away;

But one light touch the music brings

Of some forgotten day:

The chord once struck, ah! how it thrills

And vibrates at the heart;

With harmony the bosom fills,

No string forgets it's part.

A lowly flower, a faded leaf,

The murmurs of a stream,

May give, from woe, a short relief.

Bring back a time worn dream;

May waft remembrance back from age,

Its coldness, and its rime

As, for a moment, we engage,

With warm spring's merry time. 

Through mists of years, we flutter back

To fair elysian fields,

And wander down a memory's track, 

To land the pleasure yields;

Where once we culled the sweetest flowers

Through verdant valleys passed;

Oh, welcome in declining hours,

Mementoes of the past! 

The published poem cites M. C. Cooke as the author. I believe him to be British born Mordecai Cubitt Cooke (1825 ~ 1914). He had little formal education but was well known as a mycologist, illustrator, lecturer, editor, translator and the occasional poet. He was a prolific writer and a skilled artist. His biographer, Mary English, sums him up as a "Victorian Naturalist, Mycologist, Teacher and Eccentric". 

So there you have it, the rest of the story and a wonderful poem. Thank you Margo for keeping my train on the rails. 

Album of the Heart ~ March 9, 1874

This short poem in Great Grandmother Flora's Album of the Heart is from Ida Nevis. She may have been a classmate or a fellow student at the Dance Academy in San Juan. I did find a portrait artist by the name of Ida Nevis in San Francisco City Directory for the year 1883. Perhaps she was the one. 

"Momentoes of the Past"

The little violet in our path

May give us days of sorrow

Wild Violets

https://www.etsy.com/shop/karencaseysmith

Tis such a fondness memory hath

Of youthful years to borrow!

The Flower Children, Rod and Me
Circa 1981

Whole volumes at such times we read

Within the humblest flower

Forget Me Not

https://www.etsy.com/shop/NotForElephants

As we the paths of childhood tread

If but for one brief hour!

My mother, Barbara Le Francis Bagg
circa 1919, Flora's Granddaughter 

Once again I've combed through numerous poetic references and have not been able to find a published author. Are these words of insight and wisdom the writings of a girl in her 20's or someone of middle age looking back at youth? Who is to say? Sometimes the importance is simply in the words, not who wrote them. 

You Gotta Believe ~ November 2, 2014

You can't explain it but sometimes you just know things. When I started the De-Liver Me Tour blog I chose "innings"  to mark the sequence of events. There was no particular rhyme or reason, it just felt right. 

Photo credit Christopher Chung

Santa Rosa Press Democrat

As Giants fans we began to see a light at the end of the tunnel when the playoffs started. Perhaps an improbable dream, but I knew they'd make it to the World Series. It was also going to come down to the bottom of the ninth, game seven. They'd be there for me. If they won then I would win, the Transplant City Tour would be a success. It's as simple as that. 

Dreamer of Improbable Dreams

https://www.etsy.com/shop/BlackBookCreations

It was kind of like the Professional Bull Riding finals in Las Vegas in October 2013. Our guy, J. B. Mauney, was a long shot to win but we decided we had be there just in case. The championship race was so tight it came down to the last ride on the last day. He won the title. Sound familiar?

No matter what is going on in your life, make room for your dreams, crowbar them into your consciousness if necessary. Look forward and set some goals, even little ones. Become a warrior and an advocate.   

Key Hole

https://www.etsy.com/shop/PhotoReverie

We have the power, we just need to remember we also hold the key to finding it. So with that said, it's time for us to get up off our collective butts and take a walk, or dance in the kitchen, maybe pick a bouquet or fix a meal for someone. Call a friend. "Life is short and if you miss something, quite frankly Scarlet, it's your own fault". My darling Grandmother said that!

Fabulous Friday Finds ~ October 31, 2014

More wonderful and whimsical art. These two are from the fertile minds New Zealand ceramicist Cheryl Oliver and San Diego assemblage artist Dan Jones. 

Searching for Trees 

Cheryl Oliver

http://ljudmila.org/~julian/cheryloliverpottery/

The Helicron

Dan Jones

https://www.facebook.com/people/Dan-Jones/100001583345264

Keep your eyes open: any moment can bring discovery, wonder, joy and laughter. Spend more time outside yourself and your everydays, it's good for the soul and for healing.

Bottom of the Sixth ~ October 28, 2014

I had no idea when I started the baseball analogy for the De-Liver Me Tour that our San Francisco Giants would be in the World Series. Parallels abound. You just gotta BELIEVE and no one knows that better than I do. 

I Believe 

https://www.etsy.com/shop/WhisperingMoonStudio

I'm on the transplant list at UCSF because of liver cancer. My tumors, Audrey and Carmine, have been kept in check with the six TACE treatments I received at UCSF between May 2013 and August 2014. The next step is to take care of some existing conditions to prepare for the journey to Transplantville.  

I have adult onset diabetes. I don't have the body type but I do have the genes. The HbA1c blood test provides an average of your blood sugar for the previous couple of months and shows how well your diabetes is being controlled. My HbA1c has been on the climb since March 2013. The ideal level is less than 6.0 and mine was hovering at 8.1 range the last time it was checked. There are a number factors that may contribute to the ascent: genetics, age, a tired pancreas, the TACE treatments from Hell or my compromised liver.  I had been able to keep my numbers down with just an oral medication, but that train has left the station.  

Cowgirl Up

https://www.etsy.com/shop/AndSoShePaints

Damn, it's time to Cowgirl Up and take the reins. You know: pay attention, be responsible, take charge. The bottom line is that uncontrolled diabetes can increase your risk for infection and slow your ability to heal after transplant surgery. I'm working with a clinical pharmacist at Kaiser to find a long term solution. I've started doing insulin once a day. I've always had a dislike of needles, but it's a simple and painless ritual. We are also adjusting current oral medications.

I also have Hepatitis C. It's important to have the Hep C virus undetectable in my blood at the time of transplant. On October 17th I started the Ribivarin and Sofosbuvir drug combo. To my delight I am experiencing none of the dreaded or expected side effects and my health plan is covering a majority of the cost. I will be on the combo until the transplant. Having my blood clear of the virus decreases the risk of exposing the new liver to Hep C. We're looking for longevity here, there are still a good number of things on my To Do List. 

So there are definitely some new routines in my life. I've got a system and a schedule set up so I remember what to do when and to track notes and progress. It's a tedious little job, but a small price to pay for long term results. 

I've licked Breast Cancer and I am a Warrior in Pink. Now I'm down to liver cancer, diabetes and Hepatitis C. For some this would seem to be a three strikes situation, but I look at it as only a small part of who I am. Bottom of the sixth, score tied, two out, bases loaded and I need a miracle. Call me Mo'ne Davis in an elder suit. Play like a girl, fight like a girl!

http://www.cafepress.com/hopeanddreams

Following my train of thought to the next station I decided to find out what the ribbon color is for liver cancer. Come to find it's emerald green, which seems somehow appropriate for a girl born on St. Patrick's day. I just ordered myself a black zip up hoodie sweatshirt with this logo. Time to wear it proud and encourage others to fight.

Album of the Heart ~ June 17, 1880

This poem from Miss Emma J. Prescott in Great Grandmother Flora's Album of the Heart has stymied my research efforts to find an author. Many of the Album entries have been attributable to authors other than the writer. I've been through every reference I could find from Poetical Selections from Celebrated Authors to the Album Writer's Friend. I've explored openlibrary.org and various anthologies, but there's no love at the Inn of Poetry.

May you be blessed with sweet content
In happiness your life be spent

May love and peace with you abide

And heaven ever be your guide

May you have always many friends
And reach the home that never ends

And with your treasure you'll find me

A friend that will forever be

Emma J. Prescott

San Juan South

Though Flora was born in San Francisco, she spent a good deal of time in San Juan, many of the entries cite San Juan along with the date. Perhaps Flora and Emma were friends from school or the Royal Honor Guards Dancing School.

Epiphany Isle

https://www.etsy.com/shop/TrueloveStudios

Doing a little research yesterday I found Emma's grave marker: Jan 1858-Dec 1922, a native of San Juan, daughter of William and Catherine Hobson Prescott. Then the middle of the night epiphany (who needs sleep anyway?). Great Grandmother Flora married a Hobson. Were Flora and Emma somehow related? Yet another mystery to unravel. This just keeps getting better and better. Stay tuned for further developments and needless to say if you can attribute the poem to an author please let me know. 

Ode to a Serious Sunday NOT! ~ October 19, 2014

While exploring the world of Pinterest 

I discovered the wonderful and whimsical pottery of Mitchell Grafton. 

The creative mind is a wonderful thing. 

Let your's out of the box to explore. 

You may just find a new path to travel. 

Oh Baby We've Been Floored ~ October 13, 2014

The new flooring and kitchen remodel took us about two weeks. Mayhem and laughter were the watchwords of the adventure. We discovered things we hadn't seen in years, created a vision of how we'd like to resettle and in the process got a whole bunch of exercise moving boxes and furniture out of and back into the house. 

Our home of 26 years went from Holy Crap to Stunning. We moved the last of our stuff in today, consigned the potential rotating art and furniture collection to my shed and filled up the Honda with one more round of donations. It's hard to remember how it was.

And so it begins

The Hall of Shame and Bad Carpets

Old Kitchen

New Kitchen Floor

New Chef's Central for Rod

Old carpet and collections circa 2010

 

New living room incarnation

One of the bedrooms

The other bedroom

There was method to our re-floor madness.. Those ancient carpets were a playground for who knows what. Once I have my liver transplant I will be on immunosuppressants for life and my warrior's immune system will be compromised. The house will be a lot easier to clean and thus keep me healthy. Of course, the other plus is that we created a thing of beauty to enjoy for years.

Someone once told me life is short: eat dessert first, dance in the kitchen, be spontaneous, don't look back and damn the torpedoes full speed ahead. We live that mantra. If you're thinking about taking a leap of faith, just do it. 

A Can of Worms and Silver Linings ~ Sept 29 -30, 2014

Sept 29th ~ The new flooring project is underway. The crew started tearing out the old living room carpet and installing the Rustic Koa laminate. It is simply gorgeous. However, they got half way across the living room and discovered the proverbial can of worms at the base of the alcove wall. We've always thought our home started out as a cabin and this seems to support that premise. The living room, kitchen and bath are all on a perimeter foundation, the bedrooms are a cement slab. 

There was a floor furnace here at one time and when it was decommissioned (and left in place) the space where the grate had been was framed in and covered with plywood that extended to both sides of the wall. We're thinking the wall was added when the wall heater was installed. 

Oh Boy! So everything comes to a halt for the day until we can get the framing and plywood lowered to sub floor level. We made a lot of phone calls this afternoon and late evening we got a phone message that our friend Paul would be at the house at 8 am. We must be doing something right! 

Sept 30th ~ Paul to the rescue, done and done just as the installers arrived. The laminate installation continues today and Wednesday and the new vinyl for the kitchen gets installed Thursday. 

https://www.etsy.com/shop/SoulfulSayings

Highlight ~ We found some provenance on the house when we moved everything out into my studio. Each closet has four large drawers. We've never pulled them all the way out before. One in my room held a surprise:

This house built by P.J. Anderson

February 1959 

Post Script ~ It seems that whenever you get into a major project the natural thing to do is look past your initial goal and move on to "as long as we're here, we might as well address this" mode. We embraced the notion with abandon. The stove is 25 years old and having issues, the refrigerator is 15 years old. So off to TeeVax, our favorite appliance store, on a recon mission. We find exactly what we want, get a great deal and they'll deliver and install both on Saturday. 

We've never had a "back splash" behind the stove and counter. A painted and textured surface is not easy to keep clean and it tends to fall into the overlooked category by choice. My chef is the best in the world, but he's a messy one. I won't even tell you what was behind and under the stove after 25 years, thought we were going to need a whip and a chair. 

I was over at my neighbor Carol's house and noticed she had a stainless steel back splash behind stove and adjacent counter. There go my wheels again. Call Simpson Sheet Metal, they came out to measure and will install ours next week.

Camping at Home ~ We grilled vegetables outdoors Monday and Tuesday, figured out how to hook up the TV and camped here: sleeping bags on the mattresses on the floor, a step back in time.  

Go Giants!

Life is a Circus Going Somewhere to Happen or How I learned to Love Roller Coasters ~ Sept 25, 2014

Exciting News:The floors are getting redone starting on Monday so we're packing up and moving everything to my studio and the garage. It's the perfect time to sift out the flotsam and jetsam and thin the collection. So far we've donated four boxes of books, a box of collectibles that have been in a drawer for 6 years, clothing, gewgaws, knickknacks and throw pillows. They are dropping off 43 boxes of laminate in the living room this morning so it can "acclimate". Good thing we're off to an overnight adventure this afternoon, headed to the Kelseyville Pear Festival to see Dave Stamey.

My Studio

Outstanding News: I was diagnosed with breast cancer in August 2011. It was caught early due to an annual mammogram. At the time I had a lumpectomy and a four week course of radiation. I had my anniversary mammogram last week and am delighted to report there is no sign of it's return. This means I'm 3 years clear, two go. 

https://www.etsy.com/shop/JpegArt

Icing on the midweek's cake: Our plumbing backed up Wednesday evening. Good thing we have no qualms about peeing in a bucket for the night. Our great neighbors gave us access to their facilities once the sun was up and until Santa Rosa Plumbing solved the problem late afternoon. 

Life is a Journey ~ Enjoy the Ride

Top of the Sixth ~ Life Takes a 180 or Maybe Not ~ Sept 9, 2014

Sorry about the dearth of updates on the the De-Liver Me tour. I was shocked to see my last update was Top of the Fifth dated June 8th. Most of June we were on the Great Northwest Tour, but July and August, that's another story. I didn't feel much like writing and I wanted to wait until I had the whole story before I committed anything to paper. Call it the Summer Smack Down, Sparing with Ali or Who Wrote this Script Anyway? 

July 8th ~ TACE #5  I won't say it was the Comedy of Errors, but the day's journey left me scratching my head more than a few times. This wasn't my first Hospital Rodeo, so to speak, but a new patient going through this procedure for the first time might have been taken aback. 

Cowboy Kitty

https://www.etsy.com/shop/AmyLynBihrle

When you change from street clothes to hospital gear you get a stylish set that includes a mismatched set of draw string pants, a top and a light robe. Part of the fashion package should include a pair of skid proof socks. They were out of hospital issue so I had to walk around in my own socks. Good thing I didn't wear sandals that day. 

I walked down to the procedure room with my nurse and hopped up on the table. Oh darn, the mechanical and modified computer interface isn't working.  I'm listening to the two guys, squatting under the table, discussing options. Might have to change rooms, but they're pretty sure they can get it fixed. Seriously? Kudos to said geek squad they got things up and running in no time. 

The nurse who is setting up for the procedure and a soon to be sterile environment was grousing to someone in the background that the supplies hadn't been restocked. The person who usually takes care of these details is on vacation. Really, no one to fill in? This so instills confidence. 

The procedure goes well and I'm moved to the outpatient recovery dorm. I'm at the opposite end of the room from the feral ice machine and the self closing door that slams. There is a goddess after all, or so I thought. About 4 am a woman arrives from the Emergency Room, she too has been sentenced to an overnight for observation and is in the bed next to me. As she's being set up with monitoring equipment all possible alarms are going off. The irony of a poster on the wall that says "Shhhh, Healing in Progress" is not lost on any of the other inmates, I mean patients.

Not whining just observations, I can find humor and silver linings in most every situation. The staff, doctors and nurses are outstanding: efficient, friendly and supportive. It just seems like they are sometimes working in less than optimum conditions.  It was just one of those days, no harm no foul and some blog fodder to boot. 

I left UCSF on the 9th feeling a little under the weather, but that's nothing unusual. These treatments are all in my best interests, but it doesn't mean I have to like it. It only took me a couple of weeks to recover and I'm thinking I'm a pretty tough cookie. 

One Tough Cookie

https://www.etsy.com/people/LaVieIllustree

July 31st ~ I had a follow up MRI scan and that revealed "numerous additional foci of enhancement". In English that means nine, yes nine, little points of light that may be additional hepatocellular carcinomas. Shit oh dear, not what I wanted to hear. 

August 5th ~ TACE#6  The plan was to be very aggressive with these newcomers. At the time I wasn't sure how that would translate, but all I can say is No Shit Sherlock, it's taken me five weeks to recover. One of the recurrent and amusing side effects of the TACE treatments is that you suddenly have the attention span of a six year old and reading or writing aren't really an option. However, a three week regimen of sleeping and of daytime television will force you out of the barcalounger and on with life, no matter how much it hurts. It was definitely time to cowboy up, dust myself off and move on. In case you didn't know were fans of Professional Bull Riding.

Bull Rider
https://www.etsy.com/shop/MaxplanationPhotos

The UCSF Tumor Board recommended follow up CT scan in early September. There was a concern that these were new tumors and if so there was a chance I would no longer be eligible to be on the transplant list. They coded me as "pink" for the month of August, which meant was that if a liver offer came up I would not be eligible. As hard as that sounds they must weigh the benefits and risks and my number is only at a 33, not yet high enough to qualify. I have the most common blood type "O" and transplant numbers often need to be between 35 and 38 before you're at the top of the list.

I was supposed to start Hep C medication in late August. Since the Code Pink took me out of the running for a month I asked my doc if I could delay the Hep C meds until late September. That would give me time to recover from TACE #6 and get in a few adventures while I was feeling good. She said absolutely. Ah, a breather and further evidence that (1) it never hurts to ask and (2) always be your own advocate.  

September 3rd ~ The follow up CT scan and THE WAIT until the 9th when the Tumor Board meets. 

September 9th ~ Got a phone call from my doc in the late afternoon. The CT was clear, no evidence of my posse of lights. I'm to have another CT scan in December. She said she hoped I would have my liver transplant by then. Yeah Team! It could be mid December if the numbers work out. If that's the case I'm thinking Trisha's birthday on December 15th. I'm just going to put that out there and see what happens. 

Jump for Joy

https://www.etsy.com/shop/AdrienArt

What's next:

Time Out ~  Three days at Emandal Farm outside of Willits for Not Just Cowboy Poetry and the annual Apple Pie Smackdown (must taste many pies and vote on winner) and then to the family cabin at Stinson Beach for a few days. More on these adventures to come.

Clear the Decks ~ Once I have the transplant I'll be on immunosuppressents for life. The things that now wouldn't normally be of concern now because of my healthy immune system will become an issue. Our carpets are 40 years old and the linoleum we installed in 19 ought 90 needs to be buried. In late September we move everything out of the house for a few days while a local company installs the flooring. We box up the books and small stuff they move the big stuff. My first major post TACE workout and maybe a good time to thin out our stuff. 

Getting back to normal ~  The hard part of the TACEs and recovery is being so out of shape. I'm back at my high school weight, which is fine with me, but my muscles are following me around like pets instead of actually working with me. Back to walking 1-2 miles a day, but need to look into creating some upper body strength over the next few months. Damn, it's the no excuses tour!

On the medical side ~ In early October I'll start the new drug regimen of Ribivarin and Sovaldi to make the Hepatitis C virus undetectable in my blood. This will continue until the transplant so that the new liver won't have to contend with the virus. 

Food for Thought ~ I've learned a lot about myself and those around me: family, friends, doctors, nurses, acquaintances and even strangers with whom I've had brief conversations. All have had something positive to share including prayers. Though I am not a religious person I truly believe the universe watches over me.